Venus speaks through attraction, longing, beauty, and pleasure. Our Venus love language is what we find seductive and how we bring pleasure into our lives. In relationships, Venus is our receptivity to intimacy and love. Knowing the Venus sign of your love interest will allow you to access their deepest longing for intimacy and connection while also fulfilling and communicating better about your own.
Learning about my Venus material (sign and connecting planets), has given me the ability to maximize what I’m working with while having intelligent conversations with lovers so they can too. For most of my life, I’ve had challenges in connecting my body with my mind in intimate relationships. My challenges have ranged from detaching mentally during sex, being aloof in relationships and feeling physically unattracted to lovers, which are all things Venus in Aquarius is infamous for. Working with my Venus material led to a committed tantra yoga practice that solves the detachment problem by bringing focused awareness into my body and allowing my emotions to move through me. Knowing the Venus position of my love interest also helps me understand what he is attracted to and I can play up those parts of my personality when I want to.
Use this information to understand how to get closer and grow intimacy with yourself and your loved ones, not to exploit or manipulate them. Manipulation of information only leads to unnecessary pain.
Read through the list and find what most resonates for you in love life or you can find your Venus sign {here.}
-Aries: Venus in Aries is a warrior, activist, feisty and fierce. Aries is a fire sign dedicated to furthering and protecting its cause. They are extremely passionate, fiercely protective and independent. In relationships and want to lead more than follow. They want someone who is willing to stand in the fire with them, even through anger. Be bold and passionate, not wimpy. Sex with Venus in Aries can be competitive and contact-sport-like, with them usually winning. The way to their heart is through being independent while giving them a challenge. They like to hunt more than they like being hunted. They can be super motivated and competitive which can lead to fatigue and burn out. Be there for them. Venus in Aries will appreciate your commitment to the relationship. Bring them to sporting events, live debates, and anything that will work up a sweat. They love being active.
-Taurus: This is the sign that is most like Venus, Aphrodite, the lover. They are sensual, slow, and very in their body. Taurus is an earth sign dedicated to experiencing pleasure and earthly delights. They love luxury, beautiful things, extravagance, and sensational abundance. They want someone who is grounding, patient and open to vulnerability. Sex with Venus in Taurus is a sense stimulating, full-bodied experience. The way to their heart is with massage, delicious food, beautiful jewelry, and anything that is pleasant to the senses. Venus in Taurus will appreciate your effort to satisfy their senses. They can also be overindulgent in food, sex, money, and anything that feels good. Don’t get caught up in unhealthy consumption patterns. Ask them for details about what makes them feel luxurious and well taken care of and then provide as many of those things as you feel inclined to.
-Gemini: Venus in Gemini is the creative muse, playful-free-spirit, who wants to make fun out of most situations. Gemini is an air sign in service to spirit through fun and playful creativity. They want someone they can communicate with. Talking and listening deeply is a satisfying experience for Venus in Gemini. Sex with Venus in Gemini may be sport-like, talkative, fun and possibly temporary. The way to their heart is through artistic and creative venues, as long as you don’t encroach on their freedom. Self-expression and freedom are very important to Venus in Gemini. They are one of the most flirtatious of the signs and have a creative approach to sharing information. Sometimes they aren’t telling you the whole lot of information, especially when it comes to their other love interests. Find creative ways to let them know they can trust you. Bring them out to music festivals and shows or gifts that expand their sense of freedom.
-Cancer: Venus in Cancer is the care-taker, mother/father archetype, who wants to nurture and give love. Cancer is a water sign dedicated to protecting and nurturing its prodigy or whatever it is committed to. They are so sweet, warm and caring in their love affairs. They want someone Sex with Venus in Cancer is like a simmering pot of delicious stew. It takes a long time, very satisfying and well worth the wait. Be patient and go slow. The way to their heart is to be a healthy receiver of their nurturing gifts and return some of the favors. Offer to cook some meals, buy them comfort inducing gifts, and show them that their giving is not taken for granted. It can be hard for them to receive so don’t take it personal if they are slow to it. They prefer to have comfy nights at home with you or with close family. They can be a bit hermit-like due to their extreme sensitivity and longing for solitude. If you like a lot of social interaction, you may end up at some events without a date.
-Leo: Venus in Leo is the Queen or King who is self-radiant, self-sufficient and on center-stage in their life. Leo is a fire sign dedicated to self-love and inner radiance. They probably love themselves enough for both of you, but still require validation of your admiration and affection. All the little things people generally do during the courtship phase of relating is what they want. They want someone they can fall in love with every day. Dates, compliments, and special momentums of love are very important. Sex with Venus in Leo is like a performance that they like to be complimented on. They will also compliment you on your performance. They way to their heart is undivided attention, compliments and acknowledgment of their beauty and talents. Of all the signs, they are the most likely to be selfish, self-centered and narcissistic in their love affairs. You need to find the right balance of courtship without feeding into the “all-about-me” paradigm. Make sure you are doing your self-love and self-care and allowing them to do theirs. There can be a tendency to being the attention ball-hog in the partnership, so continue to expand your self-love routines. Bring gifts that highlight their sense of self and get them out in glamourous social engagements. They like to be flamboyant and are ready to be seen.
-Virgo: Venus in Virgo is the craftsperson, priestess, priest who is dedicated to working their craft. Virgo is and earth sign in service to spirit through doing sacred work. They will find out what you need and love to do that for you. They want someone who will appreciate their help and who will also help them. They have a desire to get better at love every day, like a love-craft. Sex with Venus in Virgo is very thorough and complete. The way to their heart is through all things natural and healthy. They may be workaholics and stay up into the night hours working. Don’t take this personal. They are attracted to esthetic patterns, things that are meaningful, and people who honor and value the earth. They aren’t materialistic and don’t have much respect for materialism. They can be late bloomers on making money because of feeling like they aren’t ready to share their talents from their sacred work. They may feel that they shouldn’t charge for their skills because it would be wrong. Be patient and possibly encourage them. Don’t be critical or judgmental of them when they do attempt to earn money for their sacred work. Bring them on adventures in the outdoors, do humanitarian efforts together, or help them catalog their seeds or whatever collections they have.
-Libra: Venus in Libra is like Hera and Juno, equality-focused and the most relationship-oriented of the signs. Libra is an air sign dedicated to conscious, co-creative relationships. They will want to know how to serve you and the relationship. They will put their own needs on the back-burner in order to please you. They will also want you to do the same for them. Sex with Venus in Libra is real love-making. They are respectful, subtle, and attentive in their love-making. They can get down and dirty, but only after trust has been established. Because Libra has a tendency to put other’s first, they can be empty and need help replenishing their love reservoir. Self-love routines are most challenging for Libra and they can become resentful. Bring them sentimental gifts that remind them of how much you love them and how much they mean to you.
-Scorpio: Venus in Scorpio is secretive, intense, emotional and can be scary. Scorpio is a water sign that is dedicated to deep diving into taboo material for greater depth of meaning. They want someone who is able to dive deep into intimacy with them, even into dark waters and wounded places. Sex with Venus in Scorpio has an energetic intensity that goes beyond physical means of knowing. They communicate with live-wire sexuality and the most likely towards sharing that energy outside of their committed relationship. The way to their heart is through deep sharing of personal and secret information. Do things that show them that you trust them and that you are trustworthy of their deepest most private secrets, dreams and thoughts.
-Sagittarius: Venus in Sagittarius is the gypsy with positive vibes, and the great adventurer on the quest of life. Sagittarius is a fire sign dedicated to evolution of consciousness through learning new things and seeing new places. They want to be with someone who can spontaneously travel and enjoys every moment of life. Sex with Sagittarius is an adventure in itself and is an extension of their outgoing spirit. Think about side of the road, rest stops, and the mile-high club. The way to kill the love vibe is by being stiff, grumpy or unwilling to spontaneity. Compliment them on their expansive knowledge and curiosity. Encourage them to take the trips and journeys they are dreaming about, even if you can’t go with them. Support them in their travel and education. Get them tickets for adventures or learning retreats.
-Capricorn: Venus in Capricorn is the boss, the tribal elder, the wisdom keeper. Capricorn is an Earth sign dedicated to sustainability and integrity. They want to be with someone who values for their ability to lay the foundation, build structure, resist temptation and give form to sustainable projects; like relationship. Sex with Capricorn is serious, committed and bonding. The way to their heart is showing up with your shit together. The worst possible thing for Venus in Capricorn is to encounter a lover who is squandering resources and talents or being irresponsible with their life. Venus in Capricorn values grown-up-adults taking serious actions towards life-goals and achieving tangible displays of their success. Compliment them on their steadfast dedication and commitment to holding down the fort. Bring them a functional year-planner, get them silver or gold coins, or sign them and/or your self up for a mutual fund account. Come correct with your responsibilities taken care of or don’t come at all. No one needs a partner for a project, but especially not Venus in Capricorn.
-Aquarius: Venus in Aquarius is a cosmic visionary and revolutionary innovator. Aquarius is an air sign dedicated to self-investigation. They want to be with someone who values their intelligence and brilliance. Venus in Aquarius speaks all the love languages and innovates on them. Sex with Venus in Aquarius is unconventional, unusual and transcendental. The way to their heart is through the mind, big-picture, cosmic perspectives and intellectual connection. Come to them with sacred geometry, Nikola Tesla inventions, ET documentaries, or interesting information that is beyond “basic.” The thrill is in “how far out can we go?” Inspire them. Compliment them on their intellect and creative ideas. They may not have the follow-through needed to bring their ideas into fruition, but still pay attention and honor them for their ideas anyway. Bring them unusual concepts, reference material on their favorite subjects, tickets to science events or learning workshops. There is no such thing as too weird.
-Pisces: Venus in Pisces is the healer, mystic, and lover of world peace. Pisces is a water sign dedicated to healing the planet with love. Pisces is consciousness, spirituality and transcendental-bliss-states. They want to be with someone who values compassion, sensitivity, intuition and psychic abilities. Sex with Venus in Pisces is emotional and goes beyond physical connection into infinite love. The way to their heart is through universal love and random acts of kindness that extend beyond just them. They are looking for someone who is gentle and can reach into psychic rapport. Come to them with empathy, healing arts, wine, candlelight, anything that softens the ego’s focus on individual separation from the whole. Venus in Pisces wants to feel the unity of all of life. They will often have substance and other dependencies; partly because they are so sensitive and feel everything. It is easy for them to become addicted to anything that takes that edge off a bit. So maybe don’t bring wine or mind-altering substances too often.
My goal in writing this is to expand upon the masculine approach to communication we found in “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman, which left me wanting a more feminine approach to love’s expression. Ultimately, we all must provide the love and appreciation we need to ourselves. When I am full and complete, I am able to receive love in all forms and expressions while being more sensitive to my lover.
